Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Bathroom economics

I think I've figured it out.

My workplace has four restrooms, two on each side of the building. On my side, they regularly clean out any spare catalogs from the joint (Pampered Chef, Land's End, Pretentious Housewife Weekly, etc.). We're the phone support department: they need us productive all the time. On the OTHER side, where the programmers hang out, they get all the reading material they want. What does that say about THEIR productivity, I wonder.

Anyway, I think that whenever I get a different job lo these many years from now, I know how I'm going to spend my time jerking the company for some free income. I'm going to lock myself in one of the bathrooms on the other side of the building until someone comes looking for me. I call it my profit-to-productivity bonus: The longer I sit on the throne, the more money in my treasury without having to work for it. I'm thinking of bringing a 12-pack and my iPod to make the most of my time.

It's not like I haven't cleaned up plenty of shit for people since I've been there.

1 comment:

Such-Great-Heights said...

I love this post. It is pretty hilarious to think that there is a class system at your the bathrooms.

I do suggest the iPod and beers. Why not? If people ask, just say something horrible like you have IBS. They will NEVER question your "lack of time at your desk" again. HA. (written from my office)